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12.07.2011

An Open Letter to My Baby Sis + An Update

Baby Sis left a comment. I must respond. Scroll to the bottom for my reply.

Dear Baby Sis,


You know how much I adore you. You are an inspiration to me. Why, it's because of you that I take my own bags to the Evil Empire and my local grocery store when I do my shopping...when I can remember to take them in that is. I now use Meyer's and Caldrea cleaning products, they smell sooo good and  are easy on the environment. I map out all my trips, much more efficient time wise as well as saving on gas. All because of you, Baby Sis.


I know, I drove a burning wooden dagger through your tree-hugging-heart with my Wanna Roast Some Hot Dogs post. I thought of you as I wrote it, if that helps. But, here's the rub, Baby Sis, everyone around here has trees. Big trees. Small trees. Pretty trees. Ugly trees. Dead trees. If they need wood to express their creativity they just go out in their backyard and cut or gather what they need. Need wood for the fireplace, go outside and gather it off the ground. So putting it out on the road with a 'free for the taking' sign would not have many takers. If anything, they'd probably add to the pile, laughing as they did.


Well, what about mulching it?, you ask. I thought of that but then realized that Hank and the Young Guns would still be out there.  And, mulching requires gasoline to power the machine, so there's that carbon footprint to consider.


Hank and I did discuss the idea of making a little extra cash by chopping the dead oak trees for firewood. This would require using a motorized splitter. We are not young and chopping firewood for hours on end might prove to be our demise. Even the Young Guns would tire after a while, so motorized would be the way to go. But again, there's the whole carbon footprint thing to consider. 


With the drought of the millennium behind us, there will be many dead trees, collateral damage, you know, so we will be having our ginormous bonfires for months to come. Remember Baby Sis, I love you, I adore you, therefore I advise you to have the nitroglycerin tablets handy for the many heart attacks you'll be experiencing. Better yet, I just won't tell you when we do.


Love ya bunches,
Your favorite Older Sis

Dearest Baby Sis,

Great job on the research. Titus county does have a burn ban in effect. Since the County Judge and County Commissioners are the ones who make the decision on when to implement and lift the burn bans, all I have to say, I have no idea what they're thinking. There's been abundant rain north of us.

Should my little county have a burn ban in place once again, Hank and I will be law abiding citizens and honor the ban. Though my degree of tree-huggingness is no where on par with yours, I am, if anything, a law abiding citizen. Does law abiding trump tree-huggingness? Hmmm....

Oh, if those little lumber elves would like to cart off all of the one thousand two hundred twenty five dead trees we have on the ranch to PDX and deposit them on your curb, tell them that I'll make the 'free for the taking' sign and have it waiting for them. Next to the bonfire.

I still adore you,
Your favorite Older Sis

2 comments:

  1. Great letter. I love reading the banter between you two. You are one of the most eco-friendly people I know in this state, so if there was a more environmentally friendly way to dispose of those trees I'm sure you would have done it.
    -Amy

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  2. Ha! Well, now I feel like I have my work cut out for me! Give me a week or two and I'll get back to you...hopefully with a resource or two to replace the burning. Not sure how, but the gauntlet has been laid and I'm up for the tree-hugger challenge. Don't be surprised if some lumber elves come knockin' on your door. BTW, I know Upsur County doesn't have an established burn ban right now, but just two counties over (in Titus) there is one, so it may end up in your neck of the woods sooner than later. This is according to the Texas Forest Service: http://tfsfrp.tamu.edu/wildfires/DecBan.png. (See, I'm already doing my homework!)

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